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Three Useless Assholes

October 7th, 2011 1:06am No comments

When you have the bases loaded twice with 1 out and still lose 3-2, you deserve to lose. Seriously, this was probably the most boring game I’ve ever seen. No sense of urgency + no one giving a shit = no ALCS.

Now… My Most Useless Player awards, all of whom forgot how to hit a ball once the calendar flipped to October. When you bat these guys 3rd 4th and 5th and they’re all hitting under .200, you don’t win playoff games. Simple as that. From best to worst:

Nick Swisher

  • Batting: 3-15 (.200)

Mark Texiera

  • Batting: 2-15 (.133).
  • 0 RBI
  • 5 strikeouts

Statistically, Tex was hands down the most useless player this post season. Awesome bro. Awesome…

And the winner of the most useless because I said so…

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A-Rod

  • Batting: 2-14 (.143)

HERP DERP

Dude wins hands down for choking every fucking postseason, making the last out and making the most money.

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And it all Comes Down to this Crazy Bastard

October 4th, 2011 8:30pm No comments

Season on the line tonight, folks! Good or bad A.J? Who ya got? The good AJ or the AJ I bashed a new asshole in?

I can’t believe the entire 2011 season comes down to this jokester. Come on!

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The NY Mets Are The Lowest Organization Known To Man

September 16th, 2011 10:49pm No comments

Are you fucking kidding me? The Mets are selling $12 tickets on Groupon for $7. BAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAH. What a fucking joke. It’s September. They’re like 34.5 games behind. Their season is over for the next 6 years. No one gives a shit and a half about the New York Mets. Get the hell out of my city. This is an embarrassment to New York. We are too classy for this.

PS -I’m pretty sure middle school football teams charge more money for games than the Mets are.  Scratch that. Elementary school.

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