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Posts Tagged ‘darwin awards’

If you get run over following Google’s walking directions, you deserve to die

May 30th, 2010 9:47pm No comments

A Utah woman used Google Maps’ walking directions on her Blackberry and was given directions to walk onto a highway. She got hit and is now suing Google for damages. -Fortune

People who sue Google because they get run over by a car while following walking directions deserve to die. Period. What you don’t do is live and then sue Google. Can’t this idiot see the HUGE warning disclaimer that the directions are in beta and to use caution? Apparently not. Besides, what pedestrian walks on a highway? I don’t care if Google told me to jump off a cliff – you need to pay attention to your surroundings. It’s like that fucking idiot who followed his GPS onto railroad tracks, then bitched when he got hit by a train. If Google loses this lawsuit, I’m going to kill a kitten.

Social Darwinism – if you are too stupid to pay attention, we don’t want your genes on this planet.

Categories: Rants Tags: ,

If You Die Because Your Gas Pedal Gets Stuck, You Deserve to Die

November 29th, 2009 3:26am No comments

I’m sure you’re aware of the recent Toyota and Lexus recall, because the accelerator gets stuck, which is a hazard. Yes, this is not very safe, but if you die in a crash because of this, you’re an absolute Darwin Award winning dumbass. Read on…

Mechanics 101, people. Your accelerator gets stuck – what do you do? Put the stupid ass car in neutral you dunces! It’s not rocket science. The engine will continue revving, but it’s not in gear and it will no longer accelerate. Then you simply put on the hazards, pull over to the side of the road, unstick the pedal, and carry on. This isn’t the friggin space shuttle.

I give this scenario to a few people, and many say – oh shut the car off. I mean – that kind of works, but then you lose power steering and power brakes, which can be dangerous if you’re a weak ass. And on some old cars, the wheel locks and then you’re screwed. Now listen to this stupidity:

What you don’t do is call 911 and panic like a fucking idiot. That gets you killed. Rather than worrying about stopping your vehicle, you pull out a cell phone, distract yourself and take the time to make a call. Are you a dumbass? Anyone who cannot follow one of the two simple procedures above should not be driving. This idiot is now dead. That’s fine, because he was a moron, but here’s what’s worse: he also killed his wife, daughter and brother-in-law. To make matters even worse, he was a California highway patrol officer! Are you serious? You’re supposed to know about highway safety, and you’re over there going 125MPH and can’t figure out how to stop. The 911 dispatch says “and you don’t have the ability to turn the vehicle off or anything?” (first off, that wasn’t the best advice, but that’s fine). Stuff like this makes me rage when I read it.

Edit: Crayzeesheep just made a great point: Where are the brother-in-law and wife during this issue? You think one of those fools would think of a solution? there are three minds working on this problem, and no one can solve it. Jeez

Don’t get me wrong. I know people panic. I do understand that if you’re in traffic, pulling out of a driveway or are on a local road, it may be hard to react in time to stop the car. But the worst that can happen is a pain in the ass crash. It’s probably not that fast and you’ll live. In that case, you’re forgiven. But if you’re on a highway and manage to accelerate to 125MPH, you sir are a dumbass and had plenty of time to solve your problem