SF Gate – Tara Fitzgerald of Sacramento needed help. The nude photos she had taken for her boyfriend were nowhere to be found on her computer, so she called Dell in December 2008. She was patched through to support tech Riyaz Shaikh, an employee of call service center in India, and gave him permission to search her PC remotely.

“I watched him take the pictures out of my e-mail. I watched him.”

More than a dozen of those pictures ended up on a site called “bitchtara.” Shaikh offered his “help” again, allegedly telling Fitzgerald he could work on taking down the site if she sent him a brand new Dell laptop. Fitzgerald agreed.

Wah wah wahaa! Stop complaining idiot girl. People like this deserve whatever bad happens to them as a result of their blatant stupidity. Let me get this straight… This ignorant bitch can’t find her nude photos, so she calls Dell? Does that make any sense? Let’s have random strangers looking for sensitive files. There’s a file search function in Windows you idiot. Use it.

Then she gets connected to this dude Riyaz who goes through her email and finds the pictures, then downloads them while she’s watching. Is that even allowed? Tech support shouldn’t be in your email, but if you’re too stupid to allow them to, it’s your fault.

If a guy in India can remotely find your files and you can’t, you’re a fucking idiot and should be banned from computers. Of course they’re going to end up on all of these shady websites.

So then you call the dude back and he says he’ll take them down if you send him a brand new laptop? And you actually send it?!?!? Are you serious?!?! You just gave this dude a new laptop and I’m pretty sure he doesn’t give two shits about taking down your photos. Do you not know anything about scams?

Step 1: Don’t allow random Indians to access your computer. Step 2: don’t have nude photos of yourself on there in the first place because you’re ugly and old as fuck.

So I have a very simple solution for you, Tara Fitzgerald. You live in San Francisco, right? The Golden Gate Bridge: jump off of it. Social darwinism: ignoramuses like yourself need to be killed off.

D is for dog. Okay, that’s fine.

E is for… Ed? What the fuck is that? Why isn’t E for elephant or something simple? Why the fuck is it for Ed? Who says that dude is an Ed? Maybe he’s a Bob.

F is for… Two children playing, a ball and the sun

H is for hat

I is for Monkey. It took me a few seconds to realize that the monkey was scratching his balls and that I was for itch. Really? How do you draw an itch? ICE CREAM, you shitpiles!

J is for jug

U is for arrow (yes, I know it should be up, but be easier. What ever happened to umbrella?)

V is for car (van? really?)

W is for a cloud blowing shit. How about Watermelon?

X is for Fox? I don’t know about your language, but in English, fox doesn’t start with the letter X, asshole.

Y is for crayon. What about yarn?

Z is for zebra.

And my favorite? K is for Kodak with a picture of a camera (I don’t have the image). I don’t know about you, but I don’t call my camera a Kodak. Therefore, K is not for Kodak you shitfreak! Since when do we start using company names to teach kids the alphabet? K is for fuckin kangaroo or something like that.

For fucks sake, if I were the teacher, I wouldn’t hang this shit on my classroom walls? It’s straight up ignorant.

I don’t know about you, but I’m all against using a mouse with 18 fucking buttons. How can you tell which one is which? And where the hell is the left and right click? What the hell is the point of this crap?

This stupid piece of shit is $80. You need to be out of your mind to buy this crap. Today, we’re trying to simplify things, not make things more complicated.

Apple’s mice only have one button. If only all mice looked like this again. Utter simplicity:

Only Apple creates these kind of problems

A Utah woman used Google Maps’ walking directions on her Blackberry and was given directions to walk onto a highway. She got hit and is now suing Google for damages. -Fortune

People who sue Google because they get run over by a car while following walking directions deserve to die. Period. What you don’t do is live and then sue Google. Can’t this idiot see the HUGE warning disclaimer that the directions are in beta and to use caution? Apparently not. Besides, what pedestrian walks on a highway? I don’t care if Google told me to jump off a cliff – you need to pay attention to your surroundings. It’s like that fucking idiot who followed his GPS onto railroad tracks, then bitched when he got hit by a train. If Google loses this lawsuit, I’m going to kill a kitten.

Social Darwinism – if you are too stupid to pay attention, we don’t want your genes on this planet.

If  forward slash were to tip over, it would fall right, which is forward /
If a backslash were to tip over, it would fall left, which is backwards \

This is not a hard concept. They are in two completely different spots on the keyboard. In URLs, just say slash. People say backslash all the time and it makes you sound dumb.

Courtesty of xkcd.com

Historically, this happened with the YES network in 2002, Food Network & HGTV in January 2010 and now this in March? This happened with Time Warner and Fox, but an agreement was reached.

What does this mean for consumers? It’s awful. This is setting a bad precedent. Pretty much, Cablevision will threaten to drop any network it does not want to pay more money to. It only hurts the consumers, because if other companies give in and pay more, the cost gets passed on. If Cablevision drops the channels, customers get angry. This is happening way too frequently, and networks will catch on and use this to force carriers to pay them more. I do see Cablevision’s point, but at the same time, they are just dumb.

At the rate everyone is increasing prices, cable TV will be $300 per month. I say ditch television and watch your shows online.

Years ago, I wrote a program that does that to a computer. It spams the capslock key on and off so that the typing lOoKS LIkE tHIs. It is a prank and is designed to piss people off. By no means is this supposed to be used for any other purpose and the fact that people go out of their way to do this is sickening.

Apparently, people go out of their way to do this. Does it make you cooler? Please comment and let me know what the purpose of this is. Enlighten me. The only thing I can think of is that it makes you look like a fucking dumbass, so stop doing it. I hope your future employers read it it and not hire you due to your flagrant stupidity and feeble grasp of the English language.

Professor 1 teaches an international human resource management course. She has no clue about history. On two occasions, this woman stated that three atomic bombs were dropped in Japan to end WWII. Please refresh my memory as to what the third one was, I’d like to know. Second, we were talking about imperialism and she asked us which areas in the present day US were territories of Spain. A student replied with Florida and she immediately dismissed that fact and called on someone else, who said Texas. Um, moron – they’re both correct – don’t say that a student (she was pretty hot actually, I’m surprised she was smart) is wrong when he/she is not. This fool gave us nine assignments and graded one of them. How are we supposed to know how we’re doing?

Professor 2 teaches history. She never uses a subject when she sends email. Use a subject – that’s what it’s for. I am OCD with sorting things and don’t want to guess what each of your poorly written messages are about. Second, when you write an email the following bullets demonstrate improper grammar and are unacceptable:

• To prepare your middle-term exam, you need to familiar yourself with [...]“
• “Why did the Jesuits to to Asia to covert people into Christianity?”
• “We studies global interactions during the 16th and 17th centuries.”

These people have PhDs dammit. They’re supposedly brilliant. Proofread your shit and check your facts before you make yourself sound like dumb. I wouldn’t hand in a paper like that. Don’t get me wrong, these are lovely, wonderful people and are really nice. But I have no patience for stupidity.

They put out a severe weather alert for light rain and above freezing temperatures. It’s not even a downpour or icy roads. Of course the road will get wet, it’s rain – morons. Coming next year: “Severe weather alert: Partly cloudy. Hey you never know…” You lost all your credibility, go away I’ll do my own weather from now on.