Month: October 2012


Is This The Best Voicemail Ever, or is this the Best Voicemail Ever?


I pissed my pants listening to this voicemail. This is an absolute gem. I love the commentary and the yelling in the background and the thought process.

Points covered (you should really listen first through):

  • Young Joseph, here’s the deal:
  • Say your’re wrestling a bear… A big fucking grizzly bear
  • You have two M60 firecrackers and a ???? and a Magnum condom
  • You can fuck the bear if you want. It’s not recommended
  • That bear will fuck you up
  • That bear is hungry as fuck
  • Don’t fuck the bear
  • Everyone is recommending that you don’t fuck the bear because that bear is hungry as fuck and will fuck you up.
  • You have two M80s, a canteen of water and a wine cooler
  • You could wine and dine the bear, then you can fuck it but I don’t suggest it
  • If you fuck a bear, that’s pretty cool and if you put that on Facebook, people will like that shit
  • I changed my mind, you fuck that fuckin bear. I will like that shit
  • I will share that shit
  • Joe, I changed my mind. You fuck that fuckin bear.
  • I want you to fuck this bear like a fuckin animal. Well, it doesn’t make sense because a bear is a kind of is an animal
  • Granted, the bear will probably eat you