Tag: Stupidity

This Fox News Opinion Piece on Marijuana is Laugh Out Loud Funny, Fear Mongering Ignorance

March 15, 2019


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Article: Don’t be fooled – Marijuana legalization is not about advancing social justice

From time to time, I read Fox News for comic relief, because all of it is the biggest bunch of bullshit ever published and I find it really disturbing how goddamn delusional half of the country is, that they blindly believe this crap. In the Twitter-style words of our Orange Führer: Sad.

So I stumble across this opinion piece by these two goofball white guys who are still living in Nixon’s war on drugs days, and I have a problem with literally every sentence of the article. My stance on drugs is a very simple one: it’s your body do whatever the hell you want as long as you’re not bothering anyone else. Obviously I don’t condone deadbeat druggies that drag down society, do crime, violence and are irresponsible with family obligations. It’s also wise to avoid meth and opiates at all costs, and probably anything else that gets cut down and is impure that can cause harm (wait a second… alcohol, a drug, can kill you too). But if someone wants to go and do their drugs and they’re not bothering me, what the hell do I care.

First off here are your “opinion” writers:

Alex Titus

Alex Titus, a Public Interest Fellow in Washington, D.C. What the fuck does a public interest fellow do on a day to day basis? This guy looks like a douchedouchedouche.


Alex Entz

Alex Entz is a graduate student at Princeton University. He was formerly a policy advisor and speechwriter in Washington, D.C., and is an alumnus of the Philos Leadership Institute. This is what higher level educational institutions are spitting out these days? THis goofball looks like he’s one of those stuck up 60s Nixon war on drugs guys.

I expect cited evidence from scientific publications to back these MORONS’ opinions. I don’t care if I agree with them or not, if it’s being backed up with evidence, I’d respect it a bit more. How is this shit even allowed? Since middle school, we needed a works cited on all writings. We couldn’t just make up whatever the hell we felt like. And that’s what this article is doing. If I handed this shit in as a research paper in middle school, high school, or college, it’d get a big fat F (regardless of content, there are no citations! That is the biggest no-no going!

Now, let’s break down this article:

Four Democratic presidential hopefuls have signed onto a marijuana legalization bill that Sen. Cory Booker, D-N.J., also a presidential contender, introduced last month. In explaining the bill, Booker assailed marijuana prohibition as an unfair, unjust and failed policy.The aim of these candidates is misguided. Legalizing marijuana will only further undermine poor communities and foster addiction.

How will it undermine poor communities? I will refer you here: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wikipedia:Citation_needed

Proponents of legalization are correct to point out the racial and socioeconomic discrepancies in enforcement of marijuana arrests. And yet, that is an argument for decriminalization or changing policing tactics – not for legalization. In fact, statistics collected from states that have already legalized marijuana disprove the beliefs of those who think legalization is a cause célèbre for social justice.

So you’re saying to change policing tactics and decriminalize it, but keep it illegal? What is the point then? It would still waste taxpayer dollars enforcing it, and police will still target minorities more than white men. Also, what statistics were collected? What is your source, gentlemen?

Consider Washington state, where legalizationdid not decreaseracial disparities in marijuana-related arrests. A University of Washington report noted that such criminal justice rhetoric had yet to be supported by data. In Colorado, the number of Hispanic and African-American youtharrestedfor marijuana-related crimes has risen after legalization.

If you actually read the source, the data was inconclusive. How do you quote an inconclusive research paper, assholes? From the final comments: “Six years after the passage of I-502, the criminal justice rhetoric used to promote marijuana legalization in Washington has yet to be supported by data. More and better data are needed. Preliminary findings suggest a decrease of marijuana-related arrests in general but not a decrease of racial disparities.”

This is a good thing. Weed arrests are down, which save taxpayer dollars. The fact that there are still racial disparities in arrests doesn’t have anything to do with weed. This is a policing problem in general and applies to all crimes.

Furthermore, marijuana companies target the most vulnerable communities. Nearly one-third of marijuana is consumed by people in homes with incomesbelow $20,000, and marijuana dispensaries overwhelminglylocatein low-income communities.

Bahahahahah. They cited the “failing New York Times.” Guess it’s only failing when it doesn’t support your viewpoint. Also, if you actually read the NY Times opinion piece linked, it too does not cite it’s research: “Looking at a decade’s worth of federal surveys on drug use, he and a partner determined that Americans with a household income of less than $20,000 accounted for close to 30 percent of all marijuana use, even though they make up less than 20 percent of the population.”

This is based on “a decade’s worth of federal surveys.” Seems legit. But only the poors do the weed tho…

Marketing tactics target children by offering THC-infused gummy bears, brownies and other treats.

I can assure you that people into weed are not interested in targeting children. Gummy bears, brownies and other treats are simply more convenient if you don’t want to stink up the joint. Maybe people have lung issues and don’t want to smoke or vape, but still want their effect. Get LAWST.

Advocates frequently argue that marijuana should be legalized as a source of new tax revenue. But considering that most marijuana is smoked by low-income individuals, such a tax would be regressive in nature.

A contradiction! Up above, they said one third of people with incomes under $20,000 smoke. Last I checked, one third is not “most marijuana smoked”

I guess the following people are low income individuals: Seth Rogen, Bob Marley, Miley, Cyrus, Snoop Dogg, Amy Poehler, Woody Harrelson, Sarah Silverman, Bill Maher.. I could go on and on…

Legalization would also contribute to poverty by hindering a user’s ability to gain meaningful employment. Business owners simply do not want to hire individuals who fail their drug tests.Researchbacks up this point by showing that marijuana legalization has negatively impacted labor productivity by nearly $1,300 per worker.

Why would business owners take on the immense expense of drug testing if there is no probable cause? Sure, if you have a guy coming in all fucked up and can’t do his job, by all means drug test and use it as an excuse to fire the guy on the grounds that HE SUCKS AT HIS JOB. There are certain exceptions – I’d prefer if my airline pilot isn’t blazing it up in the cockpit. But come on… If you are good at your job, it doesn’t require the operation of heavy machinery, precise reaction times and you can carry out your behavior normally / aren’t acting like a paranoid/hyped-up/drunk/drugged out weirdo, I don’t care if you’re on drugs or not. (If yes, maybe do the drugs after work and then don’t let it interfere with your productivity)

And maybe that research paper is correct. I’m not scholarly enough to validate it, but anything can be skewed. But let’s face it, if you’re going into work stoned all the time, of course you’re not going to be as productive. Uh doyyyy, Captain Obvious!

Legalization’s social impacts are damning, too. In Pueblo, Colorado, the percentage of newborns testing positive for marijuanaincreased17-fold from 2013-2017.

Or you could just not smoke weed when you’re pregnant. It’s the same thing as not drinking when you’re pregnant. People do it and there are babies born with fetal alcohol syndrome as well. And alcohol is legal.

Perhaps even more concerning for the state of our communities is that marijuana is extremely habit-forming. Adults who use fewer than 10 times per month and who suffer no problems with substance abuse or dependence account for less than 5 percent of consumption. More than half of marijuana is consumed by someone who is under the influence more than half of all their waking hours, according to drug policy expert Jonathan Caulkins.

Get the fuck out of here, extremely habit forming… Really? According to who? “Drug policy expert Jonathan Caulkins” who is not a goddamn medical professional? You want to know what’s extremely habit forming? Oxycodone being prescribed by big pharma. Consider the following scenario: “Oops I threw my back out, please give me this physically and psychologically addictive pill, under medical guise, that I build a tolerance to and need more and more and can’t function/shake/puke/vomit without. Oh, you’re cutting me off now? Guess I’ll go down to my local black tar heroin dealer to get the same effect. Whoops, I just overdosed and died and die because it’s been cut with Chinese fentanyl.”

Or you could just smoke a fuckin blunt and call it a day. Last I checked, weed isn’t making people shake with withdrawal and seek out shit to inject in their veins and kill them. Yeah, there could be a tad of psychological dependence, but that’s the least of anyone’s concern.

By this measure [the paragraph above], marijuana creates significantly more dependence than alcohol.

Wrong! Alcohol causes physical dependence. A severe alcoholic quitting cold turkey will probably die of complications if not weaned in rehab under medical observation.

Easy access to pot would harmfully impact young people too. Studies show that nearly25 percentof high school seniors would smoke marijuana if it was legalized.

Are they 18? Can they fight in stupid fuckin “wars” over in the Middle East and die for this dumb shit country? Then who cares. Chances are, it’ll be regulated like alcohol and you’ll need to be 21 (which is bs since you’re legally an adult at 18. I’m not saying your brain is developed fully at that time, nor am I saying it’s the best idea, but you’re legally considered an adult).

Also, fuck off. It’s damn near impossible to get alcohol if you’re under 21 and don’t have older connections, fake IDs, etc. It’s easier to get shit illegally than legally.

Research has also continued to show marijuana’s connection to psychosis. In January 2017, the National Academy of Medicine declared that Cannabis use is likely to increase the risk of developing schizophrenia and other psychoses. Higher rates of psychosis will likely lead to higher rates of violent crime.

Prove it. I don’t buy it. Where are the statistics?


So overall, this is a completely bullshit, fear mongering article, written by two asshole morons at an asshole moron news organization. I bet the two opinion writers don’t even agree with their piece at all – they seem educated. You have to be a certified IDIOT to believe all of these skewed facts. They’re probably having a ball writing creative fiction to brainwash 50% of bumblefuck, hick, morons in this dumbshit country.

One of my buddies in high school had an assignment to write a satire piece. He wrote an article promoting human cannibalism. It was hilarious and very well written. If Fox News published that shit, people would believe it.


Have 49 Tarrant County Texas Republicans Lost Their Goddamned, Ignorant, Hick-Assed Minds?

January 11, 2019


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Texas Tribune – County party officials overwhelmingly rejected attempts to remove Shahid Shafi because he’s Muslim. The 139-49 vote in his favor came after the state’s top Republican officials denounced the failed move to oust the trauma surgeon.

^^ Good!

We don’t think that he’s suitable as a practicing Muslim to be vice chair because he’d be the representative for ALL Republicans in Tarrant County, and not ALL Republicans in Tarrant County think Islam is safe or acceptable in the U.S., in Tarrant County, and in the TCGOP, and there are big questions surrounding where Dr. Shafi’s loyalties lie, vis a vis Democrat and Republican policies, she wrote in one of several Facebook posts dedicated to the topic.

^^So they think that because he’s Muslim, he’s a secret Democrat? Not all Republicans think Islam is safe? THE FUCK? Islam is a peaceful religion.

Star Telegram -Some Republicans who say it’s time they take our party back are pushing to remove a top Tarrant County GOP official [Dr. Shahid Shafi] because he’s Muslim. Please explain to me … why we need a Muslim in the SREC in Tarrant County! There are no Conservative Muslims or Moderate ones! Republican Vicky Underhill posted on theRepublican Women of ArlingtonFacebook page.


Daily News – Precinct chairwoman Debbie O’Brien has been outspoken about efforts to recall Shafi on social media. We don’t think that he’s suitable as a practicing Muslim to be vice chair because he’d be the representative for ALL Republicans in Tarrant County, and not ALL Republicans in Tarrant County think Islam is safe or acceptable in the U.S., in Tarrant County, and in the TCGOP, and there are big questions surrounding where Dr. Shafi’s loyalties lie, vis a vis Democrat and Republican policies, she wrote in one of several Facebook posts dedicated to the topic.

^^ WAT?

You already see it in the workplace where Muslims demand they’re able to wear their hijab and demand they get a prayer room, Former Tarrant County precinct chair Sara Legvold said. When was the last time a Christian was allowed to have a separate place to say their prayers?”

^^^WTF? Why does any of that matter? These holier-than-thou “Christians” are going around persecuting Muslims for no reason! That is not what Jesus would do, idiots. Hey Sara! If Christianity is so important to you, go ask your employer for prayer breaks and say the rosary during work every day. If your employer denies you, cry out for religious discrimination. Can your believe this IDIOT white lady actually wore a Burka to prove that there is an Islamization of America. For serious? Go do something else with your life. Christsake.

Good for everyone who stood up for this man! The Governor even know’s what’s up: “The promise of freedom of religion is guaranteed by the first amendment in the Constitution; and Article 1, Section 4 of the Texas Constitution states that no religious test shall ever be required as a qualification to any office or public trust in this state”

These 49 intolerant people are fucking abominations who need to kill themselves. America is a country founded on the principles of RELIGIOUS FREEDOM. Do these people not understand the United States Constitution?!?! These ignorant fucks are trying to remove a man from office because of his religious beliefs? Are they outside their fucking minds?

The 49 people who voted to remove him should be deported and dumped onto the Great Pacific Garbage Patch to start their own idiotic country, because they are un-American. If they were actually educated, they’d realize that Islam is a peaceful religion. Yeah, there are a few radicals here and there, and Islam as a religion DENOUNCES that bad behavior. You can’t judge an entire religion on a bunch that have gone rogue. You can throw “I did X in the name of religion Y” around all you want. If you’re a good person who’s nice and doing good things, you’re good. If you’re a shitty person doing awful things, you’re bad – simple as that.

These 49 people brought about bad attention to the already batshit crazy Republican party. Love em or hate em, the majority of Republicans involved actually thought this sort of discrimination was a bad move. Why go after a religious group? That’s only going to hurt them. Are they brain damaged?Here’s my problem with America… It shouldn’t matter if you’re a Democrat or Republican to realize this is wrong. Don’t like Muslims? Shut your whore mouth and keep it inside your own ignorant head.

Here’s some solid portfolioso.com advice: Want this dude out of office? All you have to do is publish some “fake news” on him and invent some scandal, and walla! He’s ruined. But don’t lower yourselves and say it’s in the name of a potential link to radical Islam. Even if you secretly think it is, shut the fuck up and come up with some other excuse.

People can believe in whatever religion they want to, what the hell do I care.Take something like Scientology, which is batshit, wonky, utterly made up horsecrap… If people want to be dumb and get roped into that sci-fi fairy tale, by all means they have every right to do so. Doesn’t affect me whatsoever. And if they run for office and want to do good things, then go for it. If they run for office and try to create bullshit laws based on the principles of Scientology, let’s say, to build a launch pad for Xenu to land his DC-8 spaceship on, then it’s justified (not on the grounds of religious intolerance, but on the grounds that I’m not spending taxpayer dollars on a landing pad for Xenu’s fucking spaceship. That motherfucker blew up people with hydrogen bombs and shit like that. I don’t want to die yet, thank you very much).

So go and let this educated man do his political thing and leave his religion out of it!


PS – Scientology leader people – don’t sue me. I’m tolerant over here, I was just using you as an example for shits and giggles. I know y’all sue everyone for defamation and crap, so just go on believing in your thing and I’ll leave you alone, I promise. But for real, if I disappear because of this blog that 4 people read, then I think you know where to start looking for me.

You’re an Idiot If You Drive a Car Into An Ocean

Yahoo– The road looked clear, at low tide – but the map forgot to show the 9 miles of water and mud between the island and the mainland. As the three drove their rented Hyundai Getz into Moreton Bay, they found the GPS device guiding them from a gravel road into thick mud. They tried to get back to solid ground, but as the tide rose they were forced to abandon their car. Passengers on passing ferries watched in amazement.

“It told us we could drive down there,” Yuzu Noda, 21, told the localBayside Bulletin. “It kept saying it would navigate us to a road. We got stuck . . . there’s lots of mud.”

I know Barstool covered this today, but it’s nothing new. I covered a similar story over a year ago.It’s Deja Vu all over again. Except this time, it makes more sense. It’s an Asian woman driving… Like are you serious? I don’t care if it’s low tide – you can’t see that you’re driving out into the middle of an ocean? What’s a road going to appear out of nowhere?

Idiot. Drown next time.

Dumbfuck IT Guy Can’t Keep His Shit Secure

This will be very vague, because I need to protect identities since it’s work related. We have this IT consultant for a certain project (thankfully he’s not our full IT solution) who seemed to be okay. Then I get an email from him:

Is this gentleman fucking serious? DUDE. You’re a fucking IT guy. You should know about security. Keeping computers free of viruses isamateurhour. It’s like the first thing you learn when you’re 13 years old. I’ve been cleaning viruses off my family members’ computers since like 6th grade. You have to be a fucking idiot to get a virus, and you have to be a double fucking idiot to be an IT guy and get a virus – especially viruses that spam out to your client list.

But being a nice guy, rather than tearing this guy apart, I played devil’s advocate and tried to defend him for a bit. My conclusion? There is absolutely no possible defense. He’s 100% negligent on the grounds that he should know better and is a fake IT guy who doesn’t even know the difference between a CPU and computer.

Possibility 1: Maybe his teenage son or someone went to a bunch of porn sites and downloaded some crap.
Answer 1: Nope. Don’t share a computer with anyone, imbecile. My computer is for ME. No one else. Separate the accounts, or better yet, get separate computers. Get a password. Keep people the fuck out.

Possibility 2: Maybe he downloaded cracked software, and the crack was infected.
Answer 2: Use a sandbox,buffoon. Or test it on some other machine where your work email is not accessible, check for viruses and if it’s any good, then. No excuses.

Possibility 3: Maybe he typed a website wrong and it installed because of a buffer overflow exploit
Answer 3: This actually happened to me because Firefox and Win XP are shitty. 1) Get windows 7 and it won’t happen. 2) Use Google Chrome, because it’s sandboxed and even if something does exploit it, it cannot access the system. 3) if those two fail and it happened anyway, reformat immediately and change your passwords. I did and you didn’t see me get hacked.

Conclusion: He’s a clueless moron who is a sorry excuse for an IT guy, because any normal IT guy knows basic security. I’m not even talking about like assed linux security permissions, intrusion detection, cryptology and shit they use on banking websites. Just the basics. Like how to not run ActiveX controls in IE6. Shit like that. Like keeping your shit patched and updated. Things any 16 year old IT guy would know in his sleep.

So will this ever happen to me?Not a chance. There’s a better chance that Alex Morgan will show up at my doorstep ready to bang my dick off, than me getting a computer virus that compromises my account. Not only do I not get viruses, my Google Account has 2-step authentication. I will get a text message any time someone attempts to try to log into my account. I also need to generate one time use passwords for any OAuth connections. There is no fucking way this account can get compromised.

You’re fired, bro.

If You Give Your Credit Card to a Random Stranger, You Deserve to Get Cleaned Out

NY Post– A smooth-talking con man peddled a phony sob story to three kind-hearted tourists and walked away with enough dough to pay for six weeks of luxury living at a Midtown hotel, authorities said yesterday.Silver-haired Olivier Rey, 48, of Switzerland, approached his victims in the Sheraton New York Hotel & Towers and appeared frantic, telling them that he’d just lost his credit card in a taxi and needed help for his family to check in, sources told The Post.He just seemed to be desperate, recalled Gary Koelling, 43, of St. Michael, Minn., who wound up handing over his credit card to Rey.

Rey allegedly told Koelling and his other marks that all he needed was their credit-card imprint to check in. He promised that he was getting a replacement charge card by the next day to take over the room charges, cops said. Instead, he lived at the luxury Seventh Avenue hotel on his victims’ dime to the tune of more than $41,000 in all between Oct. 13 and Nov. 27

This is why America is turning out to be a second world country folks! That’s right. We are no longer on top. We have a bunch of dumbass hicks from the middle of nowhere who go around getting swindled nonstop because they believe everyone’s sob stories. I like to be nice to people, but I do it in a way where I don’t get fucked over.

One day I was at Dunkin Donuts on 23rd St and Lex and this guy whacked out on who knows what asked some girl to buy him an egg sandwich because his son just died and he didn’t have a job and was homeless. He was a mess. I would have believed him. She was in a rush so she swipes her card and buys the sandwich and leaves and told the Dunkins guy to give this guy the sandwich. So they make the sandwich and the guy goes “WAIT. You were supposed to pay with cash!!” And walks out without taking the sandwich. Obviously, he wanted this girl to give him money for “food” and then just ditch and buy drugs instead. So I saw this whole thing unfold, got my coffee and walked out and what do I see? This fucking guy is out on the street begging for money for a sandwich, telling the same story. I wanted to pop him in the face. So I walk out and ignore him and he starts following me. I said I couldn’t help him and he was like “you’re cold and heartless.” BAHAHAHAHA. I laughed in his face and told him someone just gave him free food and to eat that instead.See what I mean? Fuck this guy. I hope he overdosed. There’s a difference between that piece of shit and a genuinely hungry or needy person. I would have no problem giving my food to someone who needed and appreciated it. I’m a fat fuck, I certainly don’t need it… And will I give this guy cash? Fuck no? He’s going to buy alcohol with that shit. You know what? Forget him, I’m going to buy alcohol with it! Not him. Be street smart, fuckers. People will tell you the most convincing sob stories and they’re all full of shit. Anyway back on topic:

I don’t care if the fucking Pope walked up to me and needed my credit card, I wouldn’t give it up. What do you expect to happen? How are you supposed to get paid back? I’m not just going around and giving my credit card to some joker to check into a fancy hotel. Holy shit. This is stupidity at its finest. SoGary Koelling: You sir, are a fucking dumbass.

My question is this: HOW do you not realize that some dude is charging $41,000 over the course of a month? Do you not check your statements or online portal? If I were the credit card company, I’d make this asshole pay because it would teach him a lesson.