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Let’s Analyze This HS Bro’s Yearbook Page

September 25th, 2018 12:22am Comments off

So I’m going to analyze Brett Kavanaugh’s yearbook entry, because I’m an expert at all of this. I worked on high school and college yearbooks and I went to HS and College with many sports bros so let’s pick out a couple things from above and study them a little closer. Given all the controversy, I wouldn’t be the least bit surprised if you’re looking at the HS yearbook page your future Supreme Court Justice…

What a fuckin alcoholic jock bro asshole extraordinaire. Reading this reminds me of all the assholes I hated in high school. All the mean, jock, partying bros. Back then I was bitter about it because I didn’t have any fun in high school. I was a goody two shoes. Studied on weekends, didn’t go to the football games, and wasn’t popular with the sportsball players. I’m not trying to be some temperance crusader, but people like this stink.

“Georgetown vs Louisville – Who Won the Game Anyway” and “Orioles vs Red Sox, Who Won Anyway” – Translation: We were all blackout drunk and have no idea who won the game. I’ve been there. Been to a couple Yankee Games with the boys and got so plastered I had no idea what the actual hell happened in the game. We were just heckling the guards for not letting us sit closer and having a time. Nothing wrong with it as long as you don’t go sexually harassing people.

“Have You Boofed Yet” – Gotta be honest. Never heard of boof. Had to Urban Dictionary it and came up with these two gems:

or

If you’re going to “boof” you might as well just have a little weed, because funneling booze up your asshole seems a little extreme. But hey, our Tweeter in Chief think’s it’s okay to to grab women by the pussy these days, so what’s the harm in railing a little coke up your butthole – seems like something your average Supreme Court Justice would be down with.

“Beach Week Ralph Club” –  Throw up club, duh. When you Ralph, you puke.

“Renate Alumnius” – Obviously ya boy Brett and his football team ran train on poor Renate. The fact that his lawyer issued a statement on this is laugh out loud funny. “A White House spokesman, Raj Shah, declined to comment beyond the statement from Judge Kavanaugh’s lawyer. Four of the men who were pictured with Judge Kavanaugh in a photo captioned ‘Renate Alumni’ said it was simply a reference to their dating or going to dances with Ms. Dolphin.” 😂😂😂😂😂. Tell me another one. A bunch of guys innocently dating or going to a dance or two with the same girl is 1000000% not inside joke yearbook worthy. The only way you all do that is if you all hooked up. End of story.  I’m thinking it was something more along the lines of  what happened with Miami’s 7th Floor Crew:

Guy seems like an absolute gem. Sounds like a person who’d make sound decisions for the US of A.

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