Portfolioso.com Blog

Is it Gross to Bring your Laptop to the Shitter?

boston.com – A new survey from office-supply giantStaples Inc.finds that just over a third of respondents admitted to bringing a tablet computer into the bathroom to do such multi-tasking as scanning e-mails while freshening up and attending to other hygiene chores.

I’m kind of mad I didn’t blog about this before the internet/ Barstool did, because some joke published a study saying 35% of tablet owners use their tablets while crapping. This is a bullshit study. I came up with this concept! where’s my credit?!?! I definitely remember having this argument many times with people, but I was always too much of a bitch to blog about it. Now I simply don’t give a shit. Welp, I’m not trying to copy Barstool, but the answer is: fuck yes it’s okay to bring your laptop into the shitter. Here’s why:

First of all, I shit a lot, and I have a lot of work to do, news to read, social media sites to creep on etc. Shitting is such a waste of time. What’s the difference between browsing some articles on a laptop or reading a magazine while shitting? Nothing.

Don’t tell me it’s gross either. Because obviously, you shit/use your laptop, put your laptop down, wipe your ass and then wash your hands before even touching the laptop again. So there – it’s perfectly clean.

(Believe it or not, I was not taking a shit while writing this post, although I’ve blogged and dumped simultaneously before”

Jon Stewart Is My Homeboy / F The Mainstream Media

This is a gem:
httpv://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Tb5aGgQXhXo&feature=related&t=06

Guess Those Boobs [SFW]

Barstool does guess that ass every day. I am going to do one segment (I repeat – just one) of guess those boobs. Only because I found this on the internet and I couldn’t resist.

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See What I Have To Deal With…

Ignore the 3:43AM timestamp. That’s when I took the screencap because I’m an out of control insomniac. These were sent at like 10AM. I shit you not. See what I deal with on a daily basis?

FML!

Sometimes things (unrelated to me and beyond my control) happen years ago and my initial reaction was like… “That’s no good. That shouldn’t have happened. That won’t fly.” (obviously because I’m right all the time).

Happens a lot. Normally, it becomes meaningless and no longer matters. I don’t live in the past and once it’s over, I don’t care and I can laugh about being right and be like “told ya so.” But when that shit that shouldn’t have happened to begin with and still affects the present… Well that just sucks.

(Too vague? Tough. I won’t explain. Guess.)