Month: January 2013

You’ve Gotta Be Fucking Kidding Me… Stairway Drills?

Portfolioso January 30, 2013 No Comments Rants

Just got an email from the office coordinator that there is a mandatory stairway drill today at 10:30 as required by NYC law.  Fuck NYC for wasting 10 minutes of my life by teaching me how to walk down a couple of steps. This is a waste of my time.  I actually have to stop what I’m doing to practice walking down 4 flights of steps while some building fire marshall hardo thinks he’s the shit and can save everyone if something happens.  This is bogus.

Here’s how to leave a building during an emergency:

  1. Shit goes down (fire, etc)
  2. Walk down stairs.
  3. Leave building, proceed to bar
  4. Live*

Assuming all stairwells are not blocked. If they are, you’re fucked anyway and this drill still was helpless to you.

It’s that simple, idiots.

Gotta Blog More, Snitches

Portfolioso January 30, 2013 2 Comments Useless Update

I’m a lazy fucking guy that only writes blogs about common sense and shit that pisses me off. I need to get back to it, but I’ve been in a happier mood lately, so that means fewer rants but less maerial. What are ya gonna do?

#yolo

If Your Email Gets Hacked By a Virus, You’re a Dumb Bitch

Portfolioso January 24, 2013 No Comments Computer/ Tech Related, Rants

hackedwordpressvirusshit

You know what really pisses me off? Fucking getting an email from some random person I haven’t spoken to in years with a virus-y spam link to some hacked WordPress install. First off, if you run a WordPress site, secure your shit you dumb bastards. Don’t get hacked. Secondly, please explain to me how the hell you even get a virus these days. Did you actually like go to the link and run some shit? Did you not use Chrome (it’s sandboxed, cunts – you legit have to fucking try to get a virus from that shit and Google gives you $50,000 if you prove you can hack it).

  1. If you get this virus, you’re a moron who should be banned from the intertubes
  2. Change your Gmail/Yahoo password asshole
  3. Scan your fucking computer for viruses and shit
  4. Get hepatitis

PS – These fucking SQL scripts are running for hours. Bastards.

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