Author: Portfolioso
My Fantasy Team is Doing Fucking Work this Week
My team is so streaky. One week I blow everyone away and the next week, I’m hopeless. This week is out of control… And I still have 4 days of baseball left to add to it… 292 points already. Some people have like 95. HA.
My players are hitting .350
My pitchers’ ERA is 0.72 combined
The line:29-83, 8 2B, 2 3B, 9 HR, 23 RBI, 18 R, SB, 14 BB, 12 KO, CS,31.2 INN, 22 HA, 8 BBI, 27 K, 3 ER, 2 W, 6 S
No, I will NOT trade you Bautista or Lincecum. Enfuckinjoyyyyyyy.
What’s Up With Google’s New Ugly Ass Gray Bar?
What the hell is this shit? What the fuck is this ugly assed gray bar that Google rolled out? Why gray? Since when does Google use gray as a color? That bar used to be offwhite and blue?
I’m sorry, but gray completely clashes with the rest of Google’s image. Sorry guys. WhatasinineUI designer proposed that and second of, who the hell approved it? That’s crazy as hell!
I Need to Catch Up With this Blog
Last June, I had like 50 blog posts at this point because I was out of control working in the school district all day sitting in the TV studio and blogging like it was my job. When the keypad of the back room started beeping and it was my boss, I would jolt up and bolt out the back door. Now that I have a real job and am a lazy fucking guy, I never blog much anymore. Not that anyone reads it. Except like 4 people. But that’s a good ass thing. Essentially, if anyone saw what I wrote they’d think I was a crazy guy. Well the answer is I’m not. I’m just fun. And half the shit I write is all a joke and for fun. So en-fuckin-joyyyyy.
You Can Suck My Dick If 20 out of Your Last 22 Facebook Profile Pictures Are You and Your BF
A little God Damn excessive, no? Normally, I wouldn’t notice and/or care about these things, but I was at the bar and someone pointed this out to me. What a good point. You know who’s in my Facebook profile pictures? Mother fuckin’ me. And that’s all. Maybe me and my boys here and there. But it’s my profile picture. Starring me. And how hot I am. And how the biddies want to bang out, but I’m too good for them and won’t let them. I steal the show. It’s not some couples profile shit for fucks sake.
So I have one message to all you jokers who like to brag and show off how awesome you are because you’re having sexy time in every picture: Fucking blow me. Because I’m better than your mother fuckin joke boyfriend.
Fuck Cats
July 1, 2011
Useless Update
2 Comments
Portfolioso
Look at this asshole cat,purposelytrying to kill the shit out of his owner with a tv. Jump up there another time bro, why do it when the TV is unstable and there’s a bro on the floor. Then the guitar tips over. Cat probably hired an engineering firm to figure out how to get that shit to cause max damage domino effect.
Dogs wouldn’t do this at all.
Source:http://animalsbeingdicks.com (I am too cool for a Tumblr, so this is my ghetto version of sharing)