Author: Portfolioso
The Bombardier M7-A is a Piece of Shit
I swear, ride on these things and you’ll get seasick. Yes, seasick. From a train. Yeah they’re all new (well 4-5 years old), flashy and look cool unlike those other shitty 70s models with the fake stick on wood grain (seriously, wood grain? That’s another rant). I never felt anything rock back and forth so violently. How is it possible? It’s a level train on a level, solid iron track. What a topheavy piece of crap. Seriously, who builds these things anyway? They don’t take it for a little spin and say “hmm, too much rocking, let’s fix something.” Nah, they just want to shit them out as cheaply as possible so the MTA can raise my fares every 5 minutes. The old trains don’t have this problem, but these things are nuts. Half the time my coffee is sloshing all over the bro next to me. The thing is like the Sea Dragon over at Playland. I’m trying to read my book or phone screen and everything’s just shaking. It’s absolutely ridiculous.
Not to mention, I almost died this morning walking between cars 1) because these things have like 200 fewer seats than the old ones, forcing me to walk between cars and 2) it decided to sway from side to side right as I walked between cars in which there was no protect. Welp, that would have been it folks.
That’s right – part two of my 100 part series on bad engineering.
fake.com is Real?!?!
What the hell is this world coming to? fake.com is a real domain name? Who’d’a thunk? Seriously, I walked into work this morning, read this email and went hysterical laughing for like 15 minutes. Surly this cannot be serious. These jokers actually contacted us because we were “spamming them” Wah wah wah…
This domain must get spammed to shit. Everyone and their mother makes up absolutely false email addresses such as [email protected] when signing up for stupid crap. Who hasn’t? Why don’t you fools get a real domain name next time? Fake landscaping. Can’t be legit.
WiFi Makes Trees Sick?
Gawker – The dutch city of Alphen aan den Rijn commissioned the study five years ago to figure out why their city’s trees were developing weird growths, according to PC World. The study, conducted by a researcher at Wageningen University, found that 70 percent of trees in urban areas exhibited similar symptoms today, while only 10 percent did five years ago. What’s to blame for the increase? Wi-Fi, maybe.
This has to be the dumbest study in the history of scientific studies. WiFi is causing abnormal growths on trees? Please! I’m pretty sure WiFi existed in 2005. Ever think that maybe trees in urban areas are also exposed to smoke, soot, pollution, acid rain and noise? Hmm, maybe that’s it. WiFi is a radio wave. It’s non ionizing and has a long wavelength. It’s no different than radio stations really. It’s not like WiFi is giving off intense high frequency xrays or gamma rays that destroy cells. They should make me a scientist who studies this crap. I’ll put them right.
And The Best Christmas CD Is…
December 5, 2010
Useless Update
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Portfolioso
The Carpenters – Christmas Portrait. 1) It’s been playing around the holidays since I was born and 2) it’s just classy and traditional. I have no further words. But I do have one question. Does listening to this make you gay (not that there’s anything wrong with that)?
Vote 1 for yes, if a man listens to the Carpenters, it’s completely balls touching balls gay or 10 if it’s fine
[ratings]