Author: Portfolioso
Saturday (2) Song(s) of the Week: Crimes of War and Chip Tunes Suxx
Double feature this week – KEYGEN MUSIC!!! (you know, the sequenced music that plays in those keygens when you pirate shit on the internet). If that doesn’t ring a bell, it’s music created with several small sound sample files and pitch shifted to get a cool electronic sound. Head over to keygenmusic.net for an archive of thousands of chiptunes. Amazing. So – the music:
httpv://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FqRraMWASS8
Download here (extract with WinRAR)
And here’s Chip Tunes Suxx:
Or download the actual file here (extract with WinRAR). It’s only 90KB (as opposed to the 1.3MB mp3 that loaded above). And yes, I do rock out to Keygen music
Why I Love Optimum vs. FiOS Competition (PS – Verizon’s better)
If you don't have FiOS, lets be serious. Your internet just fucking sucks!
That’s what the fuck I’m talking about, bitches. You wish your internet was this fast. I don’t care if Jimmy next door is torrenting his ass off , Jill down the block is downloading gigs of ponies and Marvin is streaming OnDemand all day: my speed stays constant, unlike cable which gets shitty when everyone on the same node is using it.
I just did a speedtest from John’s dedicated server on Optimum Online and it got 5MBPS when they promise you 15. Suckkkkks. 5MBPS was so 2005. Oh and what’s that weak ass upload shit that varies between 1-2MBPS. Awful
I usually say F you to Optimum Online and ramble about how it sucks but actually, I applaud them for their arrogant cutthroat marketing campaign. If they didn’t bash FiOS 24/7, Verizon wouldn’t raise the speed since there would be nothing to compete with. They’re actually bashing something that is technologically superior to their system. So thanks for the competition. Verizon’s like: “Okay, want to compete? We’ll just boost the shit out of everyone’s speed. You can’t do that.
So if you’re in a FiOS area, you’re a dumbass not to get it. You can basically negotiate yourself higher internet speeds, a better TV package and a lower rate.
Is This Not The Stupidest Bitch In the History of the Internet?
SF Gate – Tara Fitzgerald of Sacramento needed help. The nude photos she had taken for her boyfriend were nowhere to be found on her computer, so she called Dell in December 2008. She was patched through to support tech Riyaz Shaikh, an employee of call service center in India, and gave him permission to search her PC remotely.
“I watched him take the pictures out of my e-mail. I watched him.”
More than a dozen of those pictures ended up on a site called “bitchtara.” Shaikh offered his “help” again, allegedly telling Fitzgerald he could work on taking down the site if she sent him a brand new Dell laptop. Fitzgerald agreed.
Wah wah wahaa! Stop complaining idiot girl. People like this deserve whatever bad happens to them as a result of their blatant stupidity. Let me get this straight… This ignorant bitch can’t find her nude photos, so she calls Dell? Does that make any sense? Let’s have random strangers looking for sensitive files. There’s a file search function in Windows you idiot. Use it.
Then she gets connected to this dude Riyaz who goes through her email and finds the pictures, then downloads them while she’s watching. Is that even allowed? Tech support shouldn’t be in your email, but if you’re too stupid to allow them to, it’s your fault.
If a guy in India can remotely find your files and you can’t, you’re a fucking idiot and should be banned from computers. Of course they’re going to end up on all of these shady websites.
So then you call the dude back and he says he’ll take them down if you send him a brand new laptop? And you actually send it?!?!? Are you serious?!?! You just gave this dude a new laptop and I’m pretty sure he doesn’t give two shits about taking down your photos. Do you not know anything about scams?
Step 1: Don’t allow random Indians to access your computer. Step 2: don’t have nude photos of yourself on there in the first place because you’re ugly and old as fuck.
So I have a very simple solution for you, Tara Fitzgerald. You live in San Francisco, right? The Golden Gate Bridge: jump off of it. Social darwinism: ignoramuses like yourself need to be killed off.
The West Coast Doesn’t Give a Shit About Jersey Shore
Image Credit: Some website (I don't remember which one and I'm not going around doing research so sue me)
..and neither do I. Look at all these tweets at 10PM EST when the show ran on the east coast. Then look at 1AM (10PM PST), when it ran on the west coast.
See this is the problem. Out in California, you have chill surfer bros who just bro out all day long at the beach and have a good time and don’t bother anyone. Then you get Long Island/Jersey/Westchester with its orange guidos going around fighting people and being like “What’s up brah? GTL.”
If New York wasn’t the best city in this country, I’d be moving to the west coast yesterday*. It just seems to be legit out there.
Fuck Apple’s Magic Trackpad and Fanboys at TechCrunch Who Say the Mouse is Dead
August 1, 2010
Computer/ Tech Related, Rants
4 Comments
Portfolioso
What the fuck is the point of this stupid piece of shit?
You know what’s a pain in the ass about laptops? Fucking touchpads. You need to get used to them because each one is different and they generally suck. They’re only there for convenience and they’re better than that stupid nipple trackpoint mouse (SFW) that IBM used to use back in the day. In four years, trackpads fucking wear out.
Then you get Apple which releases this “stylish” stupid piece of shit. Please explain to me why anyone with a desktop would want to put a freakin touchpad on it? And wireless to eat through expensive batteries? Who would also waste $69 on something so useless? You’ll get carpal tunnel using that pitched piece of crap.
On Thursday, my news feeds from the tech sites I read daily all blew up with the announcement of this fucking contraption. Of the 4 tech blogs I subscribe to on my RSS there had to be at least 12 bloggers write 20 posts about it. It almost made me rage. I was trying to read Barstool’s guess that ass, check out the smokeshow of the day and smut news in general but all I saw was this stupid thing.
This touchpad isn’t even revolutionary since it’s been done before. Apple just took the concept and put multitouch and bluetooth in it and released it knowing stupid brainwashed morons will buy it.
Then you get this jerkoff Apple fanboy MG Siegler over at TechCrunch who writes an article that the mouse is dead because of this revolutionary new product, and how kids growing up only use trackpads so the mouse will die. Next, people call him an asshole and Mr. Flip Flop took it all back was like “Yeah, it’s going to be a slow process, but the mouse will still die. It’s just a mouse – stop complaining. Oh, and it’s still amazing.” What an asshole.
NEWS FLASH MG Shithead: How do you play games on a touchpad? How do you edit audio with precision? Video? You can’t. The mouse is far from dead. You have these $80 laser precision 6000DPI mice that are way beyond my need or comprehension and you want everyone to switch to a half assed touchpad? What are we going backwards? Touchpads are good for laptops and touchscreens are the future for mobile platforms. But not desktops. Period.
Apple never fails to make me rage.
Apple