Author: Portfolioso
Looks Like I Picked the Wrong…
..industry to work in. Not that I have a real job yet, but when I do, I will be spending my entire day with fat middle aged/ old men, people from India, various other Asians and rack mount servers. Really nice scenario for me for the rest of my life. I need to figure something out to solve this, because that’s not going to roll.
(This is what I do at 2:18 AM post college. I sit at home and think about how my life sucks. If this were April I would be doing all kinds of fun assed shit. Sigh.)
This Laptop is Getting Out of Hand
My laptop: Now 20% more Puerto Rican
This is getting out wayyyy out of hand… I went to pick my laptop up off my desk and the battery fell out. Why? Over time, the clips that held it in place melted from the heat. So in order for it to stay in place, I have to duct tape it on.
So here’s the cumulative list of the ghetto shit wrong with my laptop:
- No sound in 32 bit operating systems without headphones (hardware failure/ no formatting or driver fixes it)
- Right side USB port doesn’t work at 2.0 speeds and is not powered (hardware problem)
- Memory card reader does not work with any driver installed
- Touchpad is physically warn out and jerks the mouse all over the place
- LCD is extremely dim and the whites look yellowed
- LCD has patches of bright light/ wear spots
- Battery lasts 30 minutes
- Ethernet cables do not click in to the port because the cheap plastic locking piece fell off
- Video card: 128MB Radeon Mobility 200m that can’t render 20FPS on normal in Unreal 2004 (which is 6 years old)
- Only 1GB of RAM which runs out daily, plus its shared with the video memory, so I get even less
- No built in mic or webcam
- Thing is absolutely huge
- The black paint over the metal on the speaker grate wore off so you see gray and it looks like crap
- 64 bit cpu is not being taken advantage of (32 bit OS and <3GB of RAM)
I’d get a new one but I really don’t like the options right now. I have been checking processor and GPU ratings all over the place and can’t find a Sony Vaio, HP or Dell that I like with the components I want in it. It seems that the ones with the good processors have half assed video cards and the ones with good video cards have crappy processors.
Fuckin A.
Saturday Song of the Week: Sublime – Romeo
It is my job to introduce lesser known music. A lot of people will know Sublime, but only the big hits, so have a listen to Romeo:
httpv://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Bg6Ffr-xt-8
Romeo was released in 1997 (after Nowell’s death) off the album Second Hand Smoke, which consisted of half assed, recorded but never released material. I was setting up a computer lab with Pandora running when this came on, and it stuck in my head.
Props to the chill ass non-distorted guitar solo at 3:05
My Laptop’s Touchpad Can Seriously Suck It
By the end of this summer, this laptop is gone. Guaranteed. Because please explain to me how a fucking touchpad wears out? All a touchpad does is sense the capacitance of a finger. It’s not hard. So whenever I go to move my mouse, why does it spazz the fuck out and jump the cursor all over the screen rapidly? You have to see this – the cursor literally goes from one spot, disappears, reappears in another, clicks shit, goes to another spot. All so fast and without me moving my finger at all. The damn thing could be a screensaver, it’s all over the place. It’s not the driver, and it’s not a virus because it does the same shit on multiple OSes.
This laptop is a workhorse though. I don’t know how it keeps chugging along after I abused the shit out of it for 4.5 years: full CPU load for days at a time, no sound without headphones (hardware problem), I haven’t shut it off since 2006, it made it through college, so there was definitely beer spilled on it at some point, etc. I mean jeez. As much of a piece of crap this thing is, it won’t die. And as long as it semi-works, why should I buy a new one if I don’t like the half assed graphics cards that are being used. Might as well milk this to the holiday season and wait for discounts / new technology to come out.
(Half the time I have my laptop on my desk with a mouse, but when I’m on the go, it’s useless and painful to use)
This is Why Kids are Stupid These Days
July 26, 2010
Rants
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Portfolioso
See this is why kids these days are so fucking stupid: they aren’t even learning the alphabet right thanks to these assinine signs. Remember those signs that were taped up around the classroom with the letters and a picture? A is for apple. B is for bee. C is for cat…. Yeah. Well, every time I see this shit in a classroom where I work, I rage:
E is for… Ed? What the fuck is that? Why isn’t E for elephant or something simple? Why the fuck is it for Ed? Who says that dude is an Ed? Maybe he’s a Bob.
F is for… Two children playing, a ball and the sun
I is for Monkey. It took me a few seconds to realize that the monkey was scratching his balls and that I was for itch. Really? How do you draw an itch? ICE CREAM, you shitpiles!
J is for jug
U is for arrow (yes, I know it should be up, but be easier. What ever happened to umbrella?)
V is for car (van? really?)
W is for a cloud blowing shit. How about Watermelon?
Y is for crayon. What about yarn?
Z is for zebra.
And my favorite? K is for Kodak with a picture of a camera (I don’t have the image). I don’t know about you, but I don’t call my camera a Kodak. Therefore, K is not for Kodak you shitfreak! Since when do we start using company names to teach kids the alphabet? K is for fuckin kangaroo or something like that.
For fucks sake, if I were the teacher, I wouldn’t hang this shit on my classroom walls? It’s straight up ignorant.
Stupidity