Category: Rants
You Can Suck My Dick If 20 out of Your Last 22 Facebook Profile Pictures Are You and Your BF
A little God Damn excessive, no? Normally, I wouldn’t notice and/or care about these things, but I was at the bar and someone pointed this out to me. What a good point. You know who’s in my Facebook profile pictures? Mother fuckin’ me. And that’s all. Maybe me and my boys here and there. But it’s my profile picture. Starring me. And how hot I am. And how the biddies want to bang out, but I’m too good for them and won’t let them. I steal the show. It’s not some couples profile shit for fucks sake.
So I have one message to all you jokers who like to brag and show off how awesome you are because you’re having sexy time in every picture: Fucking blow me. Because I’m better than your mother fuckin joke boyfriend.
This is Getting Way Out of Hand
What the fuck is going on here. First, my Wendy’s closes, which pissed me the hell off because it was all sentimental and shit and I’ve been going there since I was like 7. I mean, that sucked but at least McDonalds was next door. I obviously don’t prefer it, but since I’m a fat fuck and need a place for drunk munchies before I hop on the train home, I’d go there instead just because it’s convenient.
NOPE. I walk by there tonight and the fucking place is closed down. Seriously. Walked by the place and I was like – “mother fuck, I don’t see the golden arches.” So I go to the building and essentially, all the stores and fast food places are boarded up.You’ve got to be fucking with me right now. Here it is like 10:00PM and I need to get the 10:20 train and I can’t even get food a few blocks away from Grand Central.
Like, what’d the shithead owner sell the building? I walk by there and all I see is construction and asbestos warning signs. Well you know what? I hope the dude who sold the building gets fucking lung cancer or some shit. This is a crime against humanity! Because now I don’t have fatty assed shit food to eat before I go home. Fuck. Me.
You know where I had to go to eat tonight? Not 3 blocks away from Grand Central like the good times. Fucking 50th and 3rd Ave. That’s like 8 blocks away. So I go in there and ask for an iced tea because I’m grossly fat and soda will kill me. You know what they give me instead? Fucking diabetes. Sweet tea with like 98 grams of sugar. Assholes. Obviously, no one ever messed up my order by Grand Central in McDonalds or Wendys. Then I gobble down my food and walk like an asshole for 10 minutes to get back to the stupid assed station. Of course at this point, I feel like a load of shit because I’m walking with nasty assed food hastily shoved down my throat.
Ugh. No decency anymore.
Amy Winehouse Is a Useless, Ugly, Untalented Trainwreck
This fucking mess is all the rage on YouTube right now. Lots of videos have been posted of her whacked out of her mind on drugs and just being an ugly, sloppy mess. So I watched a few of them and it was utterly disgusting. Drugs or not, she’s legit awful. How can anyone like this gross ass cesspool? First off, she’s almost as ugly as Meg and second, she’s untalented.
This is karaoke gone wrong. She can’t even stay in rhythm. You have the audience singing the right way and she catches up like 2 seconds later. I guarantee you that I can go to any karaoke place in NYC and find a hot drunk mess 100 times better than this joker.
YouTube will probably delete these soon because UMI and her publicist are ceasing and desisting the crap out of them:
httpv://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UMPBTDneqQk
What Is This Blasphemy?!
Some BS Site Hating on Ron Paul – There are a few things that sane, rational Americansshould trust as being the truth:1) We really did land on the moon. 2) Barack Obama is a natural-born American citizen, not a shape-shifting reptile. 3) The gold held at Fort Knox is real.
FALSE. FALSE…. Annnnnnd FALSE.
1) We didn’t land on the fucking moon. We can’t do it today and there’s no way we did it in 1969. That was just some propaganda nonsense to prove to the Soviets that we were better at space. I mean think of it. When you launch a rocket today, you need a launchpad. I’m sure there is one of those conveniently located on the moon…. How’d that shit lift off again, may I ask? HONESTLY. The Cold War was the stupidest fucking thing I’ve ever heard of in my life. Everyone was freaking out about nukes, communism and World War III. I mean, I still can’t get a fuckin Cuban cigar because of this shit.
2) Barack Obama probably wasn’t born here, but who gives a shit. It’s over, the country is already ruined and he hasn’t done anything to change it except spend more money we don’t have on Obamacare. Money for some welfare assed lazy people who never worked a day in their lives to get free medical care. Paid for by me.
3) I never heard of this one before, fake gold bars? It does sound crazy, but since when does the US ever tell the truth. God damn right they’re lying about all the gold we have. Fuckin China owns like half of our debt. They’ll be occupying ourcountrysoon and taking over. I’ll be speaking fluent Chinese by 37.
So according to this dickwad, I am neither sane nor rational. I’ll tell you what I am. I’m right. And he’s brainwashed.
So THIS Is What It’s Like When Youtube Slaps You on The Wrist For Copyright Infringement
July 11, 2011
Computer/ Tech Related, Rants
No Comments
Portfolioso
Welp, woke up this morning to a nice email from Youtube, saying that one of my videos was deleted due to a copyright claim from 20th Century Fox Film Corporation. To be honest, I couldn’t even tell you what the hell the video was, because 1) I uploaded it like three years ago and 2) it was probably only like 10-15 seconds of something irrelevant. So anyway, what doesn’t make sense is that I uploaded this in 2009 and it got9,985 views. I had another Family Guy clip that got 119,000 views in the same amount of time. That didn’t get flagged. Obviously, I took them all down because this account is tied to my main Google account and I don’t want any trouble. All I’m saying is that if I support an artist or a show, I’ll buy the material. For instance, you fuckers should all buy this album. I did. It’s legit. But I digress…
So I logged in and got this:
Then, before my account was reactivated, I had to go to copyright school:
Hey Fox: Go fuck yourselves. I am not here trying to upload entire Family Guy episodes. You happy I took my other ones down now? I have a mother fuckin permanent strike against my account now. I’m not allowed to make unlisted videos anymore. Assholes.