Month: June 2011

My Fantasy Team is Doing Fucking Work this Week

Portfolioso June 30, 2011 No Comments Sports

My team is so streaky. One week I blow everyone away and the next week, I’m hopeless. This week is out of control… And I still have 4 days of baseball left to add to it… 292 points already. Some people have like 95. HA.

My players are hitting .350
My pitchers’ ERA is 0.72 combined

The line: 29-83, 8 2B, 2 3B, 9 HR, 23 RBI, 18 R, SB, 14 BB, 12 KO, CS, 31.2 INN, 22 HA, 8 BBI, 27 K, 3 ER, 2 W, 6 S

No, I will NOT trade you Bautista or Lincecum. Enfuckinjoyyyyyyy.

What’s Up With Google’s New Ugly Ass Gray Bar?

Portfolioso June 29, 2011 3 Comments Computer/ Tech Related

What the hell is this shit? What the fuck is this ugly assed gray bar that Google rolled out? Why gray? Since when does Google use gray as a color? That bar used to be offwhite and blue?

I’m sorry, but gray completely clashes with the rest of Google’s image. Sorry guys. What asinine UI designer proposed that and second of, who the hell approved it? That’s crazy as hell!

I Need to Catch Up With this Blog

Portfolioso June 25, 2011 No Comments Useless Update

Last June, I had like 50 blog posts at this point because I was out of control working in the school district all day sitting in the TV studio and blogging like it was my job. When the keypad of the back room started beeping and it was my boss, I would jolt up and bolt out the back door. Now that I have a real job and am a lazy fucking guy, I never blog much anymore. Not that anyone reads it. Except like 4 people. But that’s a good ass thing. Essentially, if anyone saw what I wrote they’d think I was a crazy guy. Well the answer is I’m not. I’m just fun. And half the shit I write is all a joke and for fun. So en-fuckin-joyyyyy.

You Can Suck My Dick If 20 out of Your Last 22 Facebook Profile Pictures Are You and Your BF

Portfolioso June 25, 2011 2 Comments Rants

A little God Damn excessive, no? Normally, I wouldn’t notice and/or care about these things, but I was at the bar and someone pointed this out to me.  What a good point. You know who’s in my Facebook profile pictures? Mother fuckin’ me. And that’s all. Maybe me and my boys here and there. But it’s my profile picture. Starring me. And how hot I am. And how the biddies want to bang out, but I’m too good for them and won’t let them. I steal the show. It’s not some couples profile shit for fucks sake.

So I have one message to all you jokers who like to brag and show off how awesome you are because you’re having sexy time in every picture: Fucking blow me. Because I’m better than your mother fuckin joke boyfriend.

This Facebook Song Sucks

Portfolioso June 25, 2011 No Comments Music

httpv://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9gfg1OwAO2E

I saw this on Gizmodo and they were raving about it. So I watched it for a while… and it fucking sucks. I can’t decide if this girl is hot or not, but I’m going to have to go with absolutely not. I mean she’s  not the worst, but she’s no Kymberlee. Second off, the music isn’t catchy. She’s just motormouth rambling and bitching about Facebook. If the lyrics weren’t there I’d have no idea what she was saying.

If you want to go with some kind of awesome internet tune, check out  the Google Doodle Song, which is WAY LEGIT.

Page 1 of 4