Rank This Epic Voicemail
I got this epic voicemail on my phone and I cannot tell if it’s a prank or legit. It sounds pretty legit. If it is fake, props to whoever did it because it’s really good. I was impressed. But if it’s real, someone got themselves into some serious shit.
Have a listen – it’s a great laugh:
So why is this person calling me out by name? 1) it’s a prank. 2) It’s a coincidence or 3) My name is in my greeting. Was this random, or someone I know.
Vote 1 if this is obviously a prank and Vote 10 if the goons are going to come after me.
[ratings]
Cablevision Still Sucks Balls
Once again, the asinine morons over at Cablevision pulled another network in a contract dispute. If this shit keeps up, soon they won’t carry any channels except the ones they already own. This is getting out of control. How many times have this happened this year? Three? Food Network, ABC, now FOX.
You know what pisses me off the most? This fucking propaganda video that is playing in place of FOX:
“In an act of corporate greed…” “150 million” “greed, greed greed” Guess what Cablevision – no one fucking cares. All people want is to watch TV. They pay you for TV service? Then it’s your job to provide popular channels. It’s that simple. I am not saying I’m a fan of News Corp here, but haven’t you noticed the pattern? Cablevision does this with every network and will continue to do it in the future. Guaranteed. Seriously, they spend more money on these public relations videos shifting the blame to the networks when it’s really all their fault. And they have the balls to call news corp out for greed? You know who sounds greedy to me? Cablevision. Not paying a network like everyone else does because it’s too much money. Or – we don’t want to spend all this money because it will lower our numbers and profits. That’s greed.
If you take Cablevision’s side on this, you are a moron. Obviously they are cheap fucks who don’t like negotiation or paying networks like everyone other provider does. It’s like they’re special and shouldn’t have to pay as much. You don’t see anyone else having this problem. Okay, maybe Time Warner cable, but they suck too.
I don’t even have Cablevision and this shit pisses me off. See here’s my problem with Cablevision. They suck. They’re owned by a bunch of morons (read: James Dolan). They’ve been pissing me off since 2002 when they wouldn’t come to terms with the YES Network and blacked out my Yankee games for a season. Back then, there were no choices. But now, there is only one answer:
Seriously, if it’s available in your area get this shit. Verizon is not paying me to say this. FiOS is genuinely superior. It’s HD is better, it’s uncompressed so the picture is less pixelated, they carry more networks, they don’t get into disputes with networks so you don’t lose channels, the internet is much faster and doesn’t slow down at peak times, you get better upload speed, the channel guide and on screen menus are fast and don’t lag. And if you call them up and haggle and say you’re switching from Cablevision, they will give you a deal and match or beat your current price. Guaranteed.
Now if you excuse me, I’m going to watch the Giants game now because I can. And the Simpsons later. And Family Guy. Enjoy your blank screens, Cablevision fools!
Cancel the ALCS
Yankees lost today. No biggie. I don’t know who started today but it sure wasn’t Phil Hughes. It’s not the worst to come out of Texas split 1-1. Only reason they lost is because of Michael Kay.
Yes. Michael Kay. Because he ran his fat fucking mouth after Friday’s win and said something along the lines of “that was a devastating loss for the Rangers. They are crushed and cannot recover from this. Yankees will easily take the series” You dumb shit, you ever hear of jinxing things? Second of all, it’s a best of 7 series. You have junkies like Josh Hamilton and other crazy ass hitters. Now we have to face Cliff Lee? F my life. Every time this man says something stupid, Yankees end up blowing. “OH MY GAWD. 3 up, 3 down. CC is perfect through 1 inning.”
Might as well cancel the ALCS because after a dumbass comment like that, Yanks are destined to drop 4 straight.
The 6 Train is Really Starting to Piss me off Lately
October 18, 2010
Useless Update
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Portfolioso
You know what sucks lately? The fucking 6 train. Don’t get me wrong, we all know that the 4,5, and 6 trains are the only legit subway lines in all of NYC. They’re new, they come every 5 minutes and they go through legit areas of Manhattan.
But recently, it’s been sucking ass. This morning, I was on the train for 10 minutes before the asshole decided to close his doors and pull out. Like seriously… You know how dangerous that is? Doors wide open – a prime opportunity for someone to come in, snatch something and then bail. Plus I have places to go.
Same shit tonight. The asshole conductor probably went to go take a piss and we’re sitting in the station for like 10 minutes. I need to run, people. Then, the moron yields to a 5 train and lets that go ahead of us, so we’re stopped for like 3 minutes. In my opinion, no train with me on it should yield to any other train. I have other trains to catch, Yankees to watch.
Anything slowing my commute or getting in my way is unacceptable.
Ps, I just ripped ass right now and pretty much gassed this entire car. My b.
MTA