Author: Portfolioso

Wrapping it up from the Digg Meetup in NYC

June 5, 2009

Computer/ Tech Related

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Digg meetup yesterday at Webster Hall was absolute insanity. Good times, great show, good entertainment, and best of all, pics with Kevin Rose and Alex Albrecht. They also signed my poster. I know this post sounds like I’m a little kid, but it’s sweet.

So here’s the breakdown of events:

  • We arrived at Webster hall in downtown Manhattan around 6:30. Klondike is sponsoring, so they’re giving away free Klondike bars. Yum!
  • Doors opened around 7:45PM and there’s a huge crowd waiting to get in. We were attacked by hot MSNBC interns giving out decks of cards. I told them they really shouldn’t and that I was giving out my card instead. Anyway…. This is why I don’t have a job this summer. Next, I run into this IT guy I knew from work – small world. He built this dude and wanted it signed by the Hak5 guys. Really cool shit. Next, some really smokin squarespace.com interns gave us free drink vouchers for dancing like a “white boy” for 5 seconds. Sick.
  • I’m probably going to be on Revision 3’s website because a camera crew interviewed us and had us act crazy for meetup footage. That should be interesting… No comment.
  • Jay Adleson, CEO of Revision 3 came out on stage and talked for a bit, and introduced some sweet beat boxers and freestyle guys who were making stuff up based on what was showing up on a screen in realtime on Digg Labs’ BigSpy.
  • Here’s where the show began. Episode 206 – watch it next week when it’s released. Some time in the middle of it, I had to take a huge piss (too much info?) but naturally didn’t leave during the middle of the show. No further comment on that.
  • After that ended, there were some MySpace DJs/ bands and the place cleared out because the geeks had to get home. I fought an insane crowd to Kevin Rose and Alex Albrecht to meet them. Kevin is actually cooler than Alex, but I had three things to say to Alex:
    1. It’s southern California and I have fruit
    2. Apple Fanboys suck
    3. I agreed with his point of view over Kevin’s regarding ATM security. He was like dude, thanks.
  • If you are the girls from the photo booth and are reading this, tell me who the f you are, you were smokin’. And thanks for putting up with me dragging you in there. That was sketch, I would have been scared also. But I’m not a creep so it was all cool.

Sweet times! Week of Portfoliosofest continues!

Facebook Pisses Me Off Sometimes

May 20, 2009

Computer/ Tech Related, Rants

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Facebook has gone to the shitter, and here’s why. It used to be cool and informative, but now it’s just useless. The recent redesign wrecked things. I am usually a fan of web 2.0 fancy, glittery, pretty AJAXified web apps, hell, I even supported the new looks when everyone hated it. However, I actually learned some usability testing from all that time I spent (checking email and reading Digg) in Systems Design and Implementation class. All the AJAX fancy shit doesn’t help when it’s asynchronously sending “poop wars” notifications back and fourth.

Speaking of notifications, that’s one thing the dev team ruined. Back in the day, notifications were useful and relevant to real life. Now, we get live updates on who became a fan of Edward Cullen and that Jimmy scored a blumpkin on the “Which blowjob are you quiz.” Number 1 pet peeve: They moved the birthdays to Oshkosh, all the way at the bottom on the right column. Well that doesn’t help me, I don’t look there. Put the damn birthdays and other real life useful information on top so we can actually remember things and people won’t hate me. I became enraged when I did my random profile check (for the first time in a while, because I used to have a life before summer break) of someone I haven’t heard from in a few months and realized I missed a birthday by two weeks. Fuck. Well if notifications were engineered better then… I don’t know, it doesn’t matter anyway, it just annoys me.

Random plugs: By the way the Yankees are awesome again, CC is the biggest boss that I’ve seen thus far and I just watched Taken which was a killer movie. Watch it now (yes 5AM) if you haven’t seen it. Oh shit, my server time is an hour off – it says 4AM. I should fix that.

Here’s Whats Wrong With The Law + Other Rants

May 8, 2009

Rants

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See at this point I really don’t care anymore, and I shrugged it off and thought it was funny actually, but this is what pisses me off about strict law abiding places.

So I’m out for the night designated driving people around, and we’re hopping from place to place. 1) Some places just don’t care about IDs at all. No comment. 2) Most other places are chill and ID the people drinking – which is perfectly fine. I understand they don’t want to get shut down and lose their liquor license if we rat them to cops/ are undercover, etc. 3) The stupid ass places don’t let you in if you’re not 21. And here’s my problem with that. There were like 4 people there and I’m clearly the only person standing up straight. With less than 3 weeks until I’m 21, I’m the responsible one driving these guys around making sure they don’t die. So what happens? I get thrown out. Meanwhile it’s perfectly fine to continue serving drinks to the others (some of whom are literally no more than a month older than me – clearly much more mature and able to drink more responsible). It is clear that they can’t even stand up straight at this point and are falling all over the place, but they’re a month older and 21, so it’s fine.

So lets analyze this. People who are 21 and a month older than me who can’t stand – it’s OK for them to drink until they die. Me who just wants to sit in a chair and wait for these people to finish so I can take these people home safely – “Get the fuck out.” This makes a lot of sense. Therefore, I urge my readers not to follow the law, it’s awful and kills people.

And here are other things that suck:

  • The Yankees – I love them to death, but their overpaid players all suck ass and can’t win ballgames. Texiera is useless (right now). They have a beautiful new stadium no one can afford which is empty all the time and makes us look as popular as a AA team. We also have monument cave – formerly monument park and really nice but is now in a cove-like area that’s. In addition, I propose renaming it to Wiffle Ball park, since the design is severely flawed and generates wind patterns that cause 229323 home runs and make the Yankees lose.
  • Group projects – No one does what they should do and I always clean up after them. It’s 3AM and I need to finish a paper. Instead, I’m ranting
  • Tom Cleary – Tom shut up. If you ask us if you should wash your jeans one more time or if the bathroom is a mess, I’m force-feeding you Ambien (a sleeping pill). You’ve repeated yourself more times than this dude I know with OCD (who also gives me an ulcer).
  • Illness – It’s not that I’m really sick, but it’s just lingering around and needs to go away.
  • The weather – Sucks balls. Not only did it rain for the past week, it’s getting depressing .Please stop. Also, it’s steamy as hell and gross. Summer is coming soon which is awful because it raises my electric bill, and it’s hot and annoying. Give me cool weather.
  • Moving Out – School is over and I’m going to be home. This is lame as hell because I get to see the same 4 people all the time and can’t meet anyone new. Plus, any hopes of me getting things accomplished (which I need to be at school to get right) are now on hold until September

Fuck yaself, I’m pissed.

This Guy Just Made My Day

April 14, 2009

Sports

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Nick Swisher is my boy. I said that from day one this season – actually, since spring training. For you non-sports folk, Nick Swisher is a dude who had a bad season last year and the Yankees picked up cheaply, and has been absolutely tearing it up lately. The guy is a complete joker (I say this in a good way). His attitude carries the team. So what happens? The Rays shat on the Yankees 15-5 and he volunteers to pitch – and does a better job than anyone else. Swisher threw a complete inning, got 1 strikeout and threw 22 pitches – 12 strikes. He even shook off catcher Jose Molina’s signs (there were no signs). So on a miserable day where Yankee fans should have turned the game off in the 2nd inning, the guy puts some light on the situation. A loss is a loss. If you’re going to get killed, you might as well have fun with it, rather than just give up. He made it clear in his interview that the team’s performance was unacceptable, but he tried to stay in good spirits and help get them winning again. I would much rather watch today’s game and joke about it than to watch something close – like yesterday’s, where you’re an out away from winning it and the bullpen blows it. Those suck.

 

So what do we learn? Let’s apply this game to my joke of a life. Without going into details, I come up with these ingenious plans in my head that I am 100% confident will work. Let’s just say these plans were as successful as well as Chien Ming Wang’s first two starts (0-2 with a 28.93 ERA in 4.2 innings). My first instinct was to just mope around, go to sleep, listen to Alice in Chains and/or be miserable. But then when i saw the huge smile on his face while pitching, I was like, “Wait a minute, why can’t I be like Swisher?” You don’t see him dragging down the team after a huge loss. Me and the Yankees had a rough Monday – so what? It’s one game out of 162 – and one day out of 365. Swisher still had a blast and will make the best of a bad situation to make things favorable for the Yankees in the future. I plan to do the same.

Boys Versus Men

March 30, 2009

School Related, Useless Update

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Mirrors embarrassed by Townhouse Thirteen; Cleary appalled with the effort
By: Keith Connors

FAIRFIELD, Conn. — The ball trickled slowly, creeping inch by inch beyond home plate. The catcher picked up the ball and fired it to first for the out.

In retrospect, centerfielder Keith Connors feeble attempt at a base hit on the first at-bat of the season was a micro chasm for the Fairfield Mirrors disastrous, mercy-rule 11-1 loss to Townhouse 13: they just weren’t that good.

“It’s an absolute disgrace,” manager Tom Cleary yelled at reporters following the game. “We work our butts off all off-season and then have this happen. I’m at a loss of words, to be honest. I’m doing the best I can with what I’m given.”

“Today it was boys versus men out there,” he added.

Despite the lopsided result, the first inning was competitive. Starting pitcher Anthony Nardo worked into and out of a bases loaded jam that ended with two consecutive fly outs – a pop out to catcher Jacqueline Stanley and a can of corn to centerfield.

The scoreless first inning, however, was as close as the Mirrors would come. TH13 opened the second inning with consecutive hits to the outfield, capped by a line drive passed shortstop Chris Simmons that inexplicably found the hole in leftfielder Joe’s mitt and rolled all the way to the wall.

“I’m not sure what was going on,” Joe said. “I guess it comes from too many years watching Hideki Matsui. I knew I should’ve had a catch before this game.”

Simmons left the clubhouse without speaking to reporters after the game.

That miscue was only a sign of things to come. The Mirrors misplayed several balls in play to lead to unearned runs. Most notably, Connors and second baseman Tom Cleary both lost fly balls in the sun that ultimately resulted in big innings. Connors had further troubles on mid-height line drives that showed both teams his abject fear of diving headfirst.

“Those were hard plays, give me a break,” Connors said. “I’m out here hustling my (expletive) off every play while (right fielder Chris) Haliskoe is over in right telling me that my girlfriend has better hands. It’s absurd. That is not in our business plan – I can tell you that much.”

Offensively, the Mirrors were lead by third baseman Mikaela Tierney, who reached base in all three plate appearances. However, the ‘Boys of Spring’ left the bases loaded thrice – first, on a pop fly to the pitcher off the bat of Haliskoe; again on a base running mistake by Simmons caused by third base coach Keith Connors; and a third time when Tom Cleary refused to test Rory Bernier’s arm and did not tag up for the mercy-breaking run.

“Tom’s typically the first to go in that situation,” Cleary said. “You know Tom. Tom looks at himself as a hybrid between Rickey (Henderson) and Pedro Cerrano. But it’d be naive of Tom to test someone’s arm with the game on the line. You can’t take the bat out of (Michelle) Morrison’s hands.”

The Mirrors, which likely face potential postseason elimination next weekend, return to the field next Saturday at Barlow Field. Check local listings for time and channel.